Daughters

  John Mayer wrote a song called 'Daughters'. It's about a relationship he's in with a woman who was hurt in the past, and he can't get through to her emotionally because of the walls she's put up to protect herself.

What happens when a woman's been hurt? Ask most Christians and their answer would all sound the same - 'Just give it to God!' That advice is as dysfunctional as she is. A lot of Christians think that is the end to the means of everything, when in fact it is the starting place.

God created men and women, specifically mothers and fathers, to perform a specific role. But what happens to the children when the 'parents' decide to live by their own lusts instead of fulfilling God's purpose for them? What happens when they veer off course, taking everyone else with them?

What happens is this - the children grow up, and step out into the blackness that has now become their life, with no instructions. No light to see by, no map to follow. They wander around lost, stumbling over everything. With a skewed perception of people and how to interact with them, they learn only to survive. They make it up as they go along, doing what they think is necessary, living from one moment to the next, one day to another.

    I didn't even realize the destructive cycle I was in. Especially since I considered myself to be a Christian. But God is good - He sent someone who loved me enough to make me take a look inside, at the ugliness. To ask myself the hard questions. To face the ugliness and admit I needed help, to admit I needed a road map.

Where does that help come from? A professional. A teacher who can give you the instructions on how to live life, to function in the way you were created to function. Sometimes, you cant just 'give it to God'. Its not that simple. In my own life, the analogy I use is this - if a drunk driver hits me and I loose my leg because of the crash, the first thing I need to do for healing to begin is to forgive the drunk driver for making me a cripple. But thats just the beginning. After that are months of mental and physical therapy. Abuse is no different.

So yes, give it to God. By all means. He is the only one who can mend the spirit that is broken, the shattered mind and emotions. But then, find a professional who will help you to learn how to live with the handicap. Someone who will teach you those things that were supposed to have been learned from the 'parents'.

"Fathers be good to your daughters. Daughters will love like you do. Girls become lovers, who turn into mothers, so mothers be good to your daughters too". - John Mayer, "Daughters"

It all starts with you, Mom and Dad. Protect your children at all cost.
God's word will show you how.

Fight the good fight,
Jenny






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